One big difference between my husband and me is that when his cell phone dies, he gets excited, and when mine dies, I get panicky.
He gets excited because now he has a very good reason to upgrade to the newest technology. New technology scares me.
He goes online and carefully does the research for each phone that he is considering. He even reads all the comments people have posted about their phones.
Did you know that some people actually have so much time on their hands that they can go online and comment on the workmanship, benefits and user-friendliness of their personal electronic devices?
My question is: Why would someone take their valuable time and spend it touting or refuting the claims of a cell phone manufacturer… unless they were paid to do it? Furthermore, if that is the case, why would anyone read those posts or believe them anymore than you would a TV commercial?
Rather than burst my husband’s bubble, however, I simply go along for the ride. I always tell him that I need the simplest phone available. I want to be able to make a phone call with it, that’s it.
His ideal phone would get the internet, remind him of appointments, style his hair, brush his teeth, shine his shoes, pick up the dry cleaning, order a latte, scan his groceries, tell him when the next plane from New Guinea arrives at JFK, and plant a tree for Arbor Day. If it can’t do all that, he’s not interested.
Because he is the one doing the research, however, I end up with a phone that comes with a pretty steep learning curve. I just don’t have time for all that. So I simply cut to the place in the 100-page manual that tells me how to make a call and how to answer a call.
My husband nearly blows a gasket when he realizes what I’m doing because the cell phone I have is the equivalent of the Lear Jet model, and all I need is the Geo model. So, in essence, I’m taxiing my Lear Jet to the grocery store to pick up some milk and bread, when I have the capability of flying to France for lunch and being back before the kids get off the bus. The fates have looked down from their heights many times and asked themselves: “How in the world did those two units get hooked up?”
I don’t know if there is an answer to that question except to say that when we got married, nearly 30 years ago, there was no such thing as a cell phone. If you needed to make a call, you waited until you arrived home and used a normal phone and so did everyone else. It worked out very nicely. Nobody used their thumbs to drive their phone and their knees to drive their car. Everyone actually talked to each other, sometimes in person! Your friends and neighbors didn’t expect you to be available to take their calls 24/7. It was a more innocent time when children didn’t think the kind of telephone one had was a contributing factor to one’s social status. Another plus is that nobody ever got interrupted by a phone that doesn’t actually ring, but rather serenades you with your song of the week. A ring can be ignored, but if it’s playing your favorite song, you have to answer it. It’s like the call of the Lorelei… Hold on a minute. My phone is singing and I need to figure out how to answer it…